Shortly after Dover died, I was on my computer when I noticed the spring schedule of classes at The Tin Thimble, where I took my one needle felting class. Mourning the loss of my sweet boy, I had a knee jerk reaction and thought, "Why not try this Learning to Knit class, and provide myself a focus while I work through the grief?" What possibly could I have been thinking?!
Well, to be honest, I've been purchasing these adorable outfits for my Little Darling doll, from these phenomenal, expert knitters from Russia. I've spent more money and have had more doggone fun with her and these gorgeous outfits than with any doll I've had in awhile. No work. Just buy and dress them. But, really, if you're a Little Darling collector, you know what I'm talking about. So I thought, let's see what it is they do to create these outfits.
The first class was on March 6th, and for an hour and a half, the teacher educated her two students on wool. Where it came from, how to wash or not wash it, what sheep it was shorn from and on and on. Finally we came to the part where we held our big needles and learned how to cast on stitches and make a knit stitch. This wasn't too hard, but my memory is weak. It was hard. Jabbing this pointy skewer under this yarn loop and doing something weird in the back of the needle like a Boy Scout knot. We were to take this information home and practice it. In a week we'd learn to purl. This was even worse. It was like learning to walk all over again. This time you had to make sure the yarn strand was in front, skewer the loop from in front, top to bottom, and do another Boy Scout thing. If you got good at this, you could make a whole row and alternate the knits and the purls making a "fabric" called "stockinette". The teacher kept telling us, "All you need to know is knit and purl!" I knew this not to be true. You had to learn to read a pattern, learn techniques with these two stitches to create looks other than the stockinette, AND learn what to do when you made a mistake. I would make plenty.
The teacher wanted us to make washcloths. Does this sound like something I'd be interested in? Maybe if I were making them for a doll or teeny tiny ones for a doll house kitchen. To me it sounded like an utter waste of time. If I couldn't learn by trying to actually make something - practical application - phooey! She was well aware of what I wanted to do. Make doll clothing. Still she insisted I make washcloths and I didn't. I went on Etsy and bought a pattern that looked like something I could get through. It was a tunic and hat. How hard could that be anyway if all you needed was to know "knit" and "purl"? Very hard. 
First of all, I kept adding stitches where they shouldn't be. Dropped a few, too. We would cast on 25 stitches and go back and forth, finishing one row on one needle, then do the other stitch to that row on the opposite side. Of course if you did only knit stitches back and forth, you'd get what they call the garter stitch. None of this was making any sense, but I don't follow patterns very well, and we all know that. This truly won't work if you're going to knit unless you are SO good and talented, that you can make up anything as you go along. Which is what I've been doing for years. Making things up as I went along. So I really had to concentrate, do a tiny bit, check my work, check off a row on the pattern, repeat. None of this was working, and there were no more classes. I was told you could go on Youtube and learn what you needed to. Brilliant. But, I bugged my teacher so much on email that she suggested I meet with her the second Saturday after I started learning to knit. I shared the pattern with her beforehand so she could help me when we got together. 
She showed up that Saturday with a completed little tunic and said, "We're going to do this together." Relief! I'd have help every step of the way. But I only got six or eight rows done after two hours, and watched as she fixed my mistakes. This was turning into torture. I needed to be able to fix my own mistakes. Why couldn't I get this?? I made notations all over the pattern pages. She tried to teach me how to read the pattern. Nothing was making sense because it was too much information all at once. Of course, later I would discover that there's this thing called gauge and needle size and having to make swatches to test all this to make sure you were getting for instance, six stitches to the inch, and if you wanted to use a different yarn, you needed a different needle size, and then you'd have to recalculate the whole pattern. 
The "why" was very important to me. Why are we making so many stitches then changing them? Why are we moving stitches from one needle to the other? "This is the sleeve.", she'd tell me. Oh. And, now what do we do? Do you just keep working this then get a surprise when you finish? I actually thought you made a buttonhole by stretching the yarn and shoving a button through it. And, so it went.
As it turned out, I spent so much time on Youtube learning how to unknit, or "tink", and "frog", which is pulling out everything and trying to get the needle back on the stitches, that I literally learned "the beginnings of knitting" in front of my computer. I'd get just so far, then make a mistake, have to figure out where the mistake happened, then learn how to fix it, and on an on it went. Sometimes I'd just cut the yarn off and start all over again. It was agony. I did this for three solid weeks and cried bitterly to my friends. But, I wasn't going to let knitting get the better of me. I'd spent all this time trying already. I didn't want to be a failure. I didn't want to have made a poor decision to begin learning to knit, and have wasted my time. I felt like I was punishing myself for losing Dover to cancer. Seriously. I was not in a good place. But, I persevered, and when I got this ruffly skirt done on this tunic, I felt a small sense of accomplishment. The hat was a breeze. Maybe not a breeze, but it sure did come together a lot more quickly without dealing with sleeves and combinations that produced a fancy effect. By the time I finished this set, I'd already purchased another pattern off Etsy by the same seller. Let's try something else.
In the meantime, I'd been invited by my former teacher to join their knitting group on Tuesday nights. She indicated they all helped each other, but it looked like I was the only one asking questions as all these women were pros. Still, there was a good energy and it felt nice to be included. Knitting has been intimidating, but these ladies are so laid back that I felt some hope. And, I'm still meeting with them on Tuesday nights. Its fun!
This pinky-coral tunic and hat were going to end up in the trash. The back placket was a mess. This is not something I would make my doll suffer wearing. Not when she's been wearing the best of the best. And, I had an entire skein of aqua from the contrast color. So I started the little dress and sun hat.
Again we casted on the 33 stitches for the neckline. Things were beginning to make a bit more sense. Same pattern maker, same kinds of instructions, got through the sleeves. Oops. What's this star stitch? This was a "technique" where you purl three stitches together, do a yarn over (had to learn that, too, plus make one left and make on right, M1L, M1R), then purl the whole chunk of stitches together and yank it off the needle. For those of you who knit out there, I'll bet you've guessed what one of my problems was. I was knitting too tightly. Okay, so I was tense. And, I was struggling, but knitting tightly only makes matters worse. The concept of loopy, or sloppy looking loops that will not look that way once you do the next row was very foreign to me and still is. But, I am trying to loosen them up. The star stitch made that happen. 
I was confused about how to make one, so dropped into Auburn Needleworks where this angel of a woman, Karen, sat patiently with me and showed me how to make them. She and I worked the bodice row together, while she did her best to loosen my stitches so that we could actually purl three together. It was like trying to tear off a piece of beef jerky with no teeth. All the while on Tuesday nights, my former teacher would tell me, "Wash cloths! Make wash cloths!" I still don't see how making wash cloths is going to teach you all that I've been learning in how to actually make a doll dress from a pattern. And, purchase the correct size yarn and needles to make it. (I think I can do this on my own now, but still ask for assistance.) Karen hoped I'd come back and knit with them, and I will, but I wanted to come back and show her that her efforts in teaching me the star stitch weren't in vain. 
So I went home and the next day, and after a series of stockinette stitches, got down to the stars. Remember, these pieces were practice pieces, so I wasn't expecting greatness. And, I was so careful following the pattern and marking off on the pattern after I'd finish a row. Well, I finished the dress, and the stars at the hem were done backwards. I didn't cry. I didn't quit, but I did try to think of how I could undo this all to get back up to the place where I could redo them. It took me SIX hours to redo this. I finally just pulled out the needles and started pulling out the stitches. then something weird happened. The working yarn strand was attached at one end and in the middle. Now what? At this point, I could have reknit the entire dress in the six hours it took to try and fix the problem. I really was ready to call it quits, so I pulled the other needle out, and the remaining stitches on it, and guess what? It was a complete row I could begin again on! Whoa! I counted the "v" stitches down in several places and it all checked out, so I continued.
Then I came to the row needing the star stitches at the hem. I didn't want to make the same mistake twice, so I did a test piece to prove my theory that they needed to be done on the purl side. Yes. It worked. And guess what? There was definitely an error made in writing that pattern. She also called for five buttons, but only gave you instructions for three buttonholes. I guess you could stretch out the knitted yarn and shove a button through it after all. Well, let's put it this way. You have to have a sense of humor and an adventurous spirit to try this stuff - knitting. I'm a knitter, not a quitter.
I've been looking at a lot patterns and buying skeins of yarn for future outfits. The pdf patterns don't cost but $5, but there sure is no consistency in how they are written. You almost have to get the know the person and what they're trying to convey, ask you what to do, before beginning.
I discovered that there are patterns for knitting tiny toys! However, you need to be able to work four needles and sometimes a fifth in making these as some are done "in the round". So, no. You don't only need to just know just knit and purl. I knew this going into it, and have since gotten a fairly good idea how very vast the world of knitting is. And, that there are sellers on Etsy who have made these tiny animals and toys to sell, in both knitting and crocheting! Yay! I don't have to learn this right away! I can just purchase these cute little things for my doll to hold while wearing her beautifully knitted outfits made by the pros. I do want to try the toys, but I think I'll try it in crochet first when that time comes. One needle. I know I'd enjoy this if I ever tried it and could follow the patterns and actually make something.
So I got through the second pattern. Again, the hat was the easier piece to make. I finished this yesterday, and this is what I've been doing daily since March the 6th. There is a pattern for a little summer dress that I'm going to try next. I also found this fabulous button maker and have been planning two outfits around the buttons. The buttons are that fabulous. I also bought another Little Darling, my second. She'll be ready to come home in May sometime. The plan is to make twin outfits with alternating colors.
I realize I'm going to make mistakes. I'm going to have problems. I'll probably have to make a dress as a mock up to understand the pattern first, before I do a second one that will hopefully be a keeper. Knitting is a focus, a meditation of sorts, but you sure do have to be on top of it. I can't wait to show Karen the completed outfit with the stars she showed me how to make. She was so kind and patient. How better to thank someone for their time than showing them that it was worth it?
Its funny, but all these knitters in town seem to only make human sized things. They get a kick out of seeing the doll clothes. They want to know about dolls and ask. So maybe I do have something to offer these experts. I haven't been so intimidated and humbled by learning something since the class I took in Intro to Algebra. My mind works in its own way. I'm teaching my brain to make connections differently now. You can't just look at something and reproduce it without some kind of pattern or understanding in knitting. At least not yet. I don't want to become an expert knitter. I just want to be able to make something cute, something I'll be proud to display on my doll. I'm already thinking of how I can alter patterns to get a look that's to my liking, making it my own.
So yes, I did a crash course in learning to knit, and that was okay. And, I never want to hear the word washcloth again ;))
Summer has already arrived in Auburn. The long cold and rainy season is past. Its time to look forward. Wish me luck with my knitting! (Its actually kind of addicting.)
Love,
Melissa
